Relationships with parents and children, or children with parents, can be challenging sometimes, at any age.
I just want to remind you of things that we don’t always think about every day when it comes to this topic.
When we have children we just need to give them love, period. To support, by hugging, kissing, giving direction, compliments, giving them courage, and being there for them. Let them know we are behind them in any way, raising them to be independent. This is important for children to see that they can come back to at any time it gets hard.
Children are not our belongings as parents, we just need to guide them and go through life with them. It changes as they get older, and when they do get older we still need to be with them as support, to guide them, and to also let go and not be involved if they don’t ask.
It is best not to complain about things, especially about your children. When you can invest in your children, it comes back to you in different ways.
They grow strong, they take care of you later on, and you feel love. Never let them feel that you want them to do something that you want, and they may not. Try to give them freedom.
If your children are still in your house, set your rules for that house. Also, try to help them and trust them but set your own guidelines, and set boundaries that help the children grow with responsibilities, respect, and appreciation.
Parents need to understand their children and realize that the children came through them to help them understand life. All of the challenges and circumstances that come to us in between are lessons for us to grow. Children don’t need to be like their parents they can be different or similar but come through to learn their own lessons in the circumstances.
The most important thing a parent can give is love and attention. Have respect and set them free. This can go for the children too, when looking at their parents, they are also just there to love and respect them. This brings love, understanding, and support.
It does not matter the age, this perspective will help bring peace to the relationships between parents and children to really feel and understand the other person.
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RACHEL BENOR 